Over the break, Dave saw Paul performing with a bunch of cats at a nightclub. Dave has said it before and he says it again; Night in and night out, Paul and the band is the best thing about the show. Dave was amazed at how Paul fit right in with a group of musicians he'd never met before. Says Dave about Paul, "He is so much better at what he does than what I do." Paul thanks Dave for the kind words, and Paul still can't believe that he saw Dave out at a nightclub! "I saw it with my own eyes!" exclaims Paul.

CBS is teaming up with Verizon to send clips of its shows directly to people's cell phones. (Hoo boy, get me the that "Do Not Call" list.) And we at the Late Show are very proud that the network has included us in the deal. We look at a clip.
Announcer:

"Ever want to take your favorite CBS shows on the go? Now you can, thanks to Verizon Wireless's new V Cast package. Starting this month, V Cast subscribers will receive free highlights of 'CSI', 'The Amazing Race,' and the 'Late Show.' Right on their cell phones! Or for an extra $5.95 a month, you can subscribe to our platinum service . . . . and get 'CSI', and 'The Amazing Race' without that annoying Letterman jackass. CBS and Verizon Wireless: It's all here!"

"Iraqi citizens! Make your voice heard this Thursday! Vote in the election to decide who is the hotter gay cowboy: Heath Ledger or Jake Gyllenhaal! It's up to you! A reminder from the Iraqi Election Commission."

And if you've noticed, we've decorated the stage of the Ed Sullivan Theater in festive Christmas lights and sights. And as we do every year, we invite in our neighbors of today and the past to decorate our Christmas Tree. Joining us tonight:
1. Joe G, owner of Joe G's Pizza formerly found right under the Late Show marquee. He and his pizza can now be found around the corner at 244 West 56th Street, between 56th and Broadway. He will be placing a large cheese pizza atop the tree.
2. Mujibur and Sirajul, formerly of the K&M gift and souvenir shop at the S/W corner of 54th and Broadway. The new expensive lease forced them out. Now found at the S/W corner of 54th and Broadway is . . . . nothing. Nothing but a shuttered commercial property, bringing in no rent for the landlord. Nice going, genius! I've never taken a business course in my life but I can tell that's not good business strategy. Mujibur and Sirajul will place a statue of the Empire State Building on top of the cheese pizza.
3. And Rupert, still remaining at the Hello Deli, will place one of his famous meatballs on top of the Empire spike, topping it with a ladle of spaghetti sauce.

As the group enters, the Grinder Girl and the Hula Hoop girl join the fun at the tree, along with the Late Show model lugging in the ladder. Like clockwork, the tree toppings are placed with care. Oh, how much fun! It's nice to see the whole gang back again.
But what about the new pizza place outside the theater, Angelo's? Why don't we get that guy in here too? Not sure, but it may be his thin crust pizza wouldn't be able to withstand a week on the spike. Not enough gluttonous dough to stay up for two weeks. Who knows? Maybe we'll make it an ACT 1 for Tuesday.

TOP TEN:
Alan (with meat drippings dripping from his face): "Tonight's top ten list is brought to you by spit-roasted meats. Spit-roasted meats: America's favorite meat roasting treat since the discovery of fire. And hey, mom, spit-roasted meats are more flavorful and nutritious than just about anything you can imagine. This holiday season, why not treat your family to spit-roasted meats? You'll be glad you did."
Dave: "Alan, what's that dripping from your face?"
Alan: "Just before the show, I was enjoying a variety of spit-roasted meats."

Perks of Winning the Heisman Trophy - the 71st Annual presentation of the Heisman Memorial Trophy was awarded this weekend, given to the nation's most outstanding college football player of the year. And to present tonight's top ten list, from the University of Southern California, your 2005 Heisman Trophy winner, Reggie Bush.
#5. Now maybe someone on the team'll get a date besides pretty boy Matt Leinart.
#4. Steinbrenner's trying to get me to sign with the Yankees.
#3. I now have the world's most valuable paperweight.

JACK BLACK: He's in the super-hyped "King Kong" movie. And from what I hear, it deserves to be super-hyped. Great, unbelievable special effects. Jack is excited for the movie but had major concerns about how he would look. Before shooting the movie, it was mentioned to Jack that Clint Eastwood never used makeup during his movies. Jack isn't a fan of the makeup so he put in a request that he too would not have to wear makeup. Clint Eastwood doesn't use makeup. Jack Black won't wear makeup either. Jack shot the whole film without makeup. And then just before the release of the film, he learned that Clint Eastwood DOES wear makeup. DOH!!!! Now Jack was worried he would look like "Pale face McGee." Luckily, through the magic of director Peter Jackson, he was able to make Jack Black look totally normal. Why, Jack Black looking normal? Now that's what I call special effects! Bah-dum-bum.

Since the making of "King Kong", Jack suffered an injury in his most recent film. Jack plays a priest by day, a professional wrestler by night. His wrestling money he uses to help out the orphans. If this movie is anywhere as good as "The One and Only" with Henry Winkler, then I'm there. In this priest/wrestling movie, Jack tried to do one of his own stunts during a wrestling match. Whack. Jack jumped a turnbuckle and hit his eye smack-dab on a metal chair. Blood and stitches and a black eye. The best plastic surgeon in all of Oaxaca, Mexico was rushed in to sew him up. Now if you ignore the scare over his left eye, you wouldn't even know Jack had stitches there.
"King Kong" - it opens Wednesday. I saw the previews. My favorite part is when Kong is brought to New York City as a circus act and this cute little girl walks up to the shop window and says, "How much is that gorilla in the window?" The shopkeeper, so keen in getting rid of the huge cost of keeping the gorilla, reduces his asking price down to 2 cents. The girl, Ogee is her name, gladly makes the purchase. I won't give away the ending, but soon all hell breaks loose.

ACT 5: LATE SHOW OFFICE REDO: We've been inspired by those inspiring "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" and "Three Wishes" television programs and decided to try one of our own. We show our first installment of Late Show Office Redo.
We see a clip of an enthusiastic Generation Y lad introducing the piece. Behind him stands his team.
Leader: "Hi, and welcome to another 'Late Show Office Redo.' Today, we're going to surprise one lucky 'Late Show' viewer and completely renovate their work space. Come on, design team!" The leader and the team run off camera. We cut to see a gentleman hard at work in his office.
Leader: "Congratulations, Joe. We're going to give you . . . a 'Late Show Office Redo!'"
Cut to various scenes of the team hard at work; painting, cutting, filing, hammering, etc.
Leader: "Okay, Joe, ready to see your new office?"
Joe and leader enter office. Cut to office. It is in complete shambles.
Leader: "What do you think?"
Joe: "What the f-"
And that was our first installment of Late Show Office Redo.

SINEAD O'CONNOR: From her newest CD, "Throw Down Your Arms", Sinead, along with special guests Sly and Robbie, performed the lovely, "Untold Stories."

And that was our show for Monday, December 12, 2005. Wahoo EXTRA!

I certainly don't mind people saying "Happy Holidays", but a Christmas tree is a Christmas tree is a Christmas tree. It's not a holiday tree.

And we're back. I was met with a near 2-hour morning commute; a broken copy machine; a freezing office due to a broken window; and a paper cut. All this before I took off my jacket. I was thinking of turning around and going home but I was afraid my car wouldn't start.

Has there ever a child who went to the orthodontist and was told, "Nope, you don't need braces!"? I don't think so. I'm 0 for 2.

The MTA, the Metropolitan Transit Authority here in New York City, comprising of the bus and subway system, is planning on a work slowdown before their possible strike on Thursday. About their slowdown . . . . how will we know?

Here's something that I found a bit odd this week. My 10-year-old daughter Danielle isn't happy with her Barbie bicycle anymore. "Too babyish" she claims. I fish around trying to figure out what kind of bicycle she may want for Christmas. She says she doesn't want a new bicycle. "I'll just paint my old one black" she explains. "But don't you want a NEW bicycle?" I ask. Without looking up, she says, "Nah."
What kid doesn't want a new bicycle?

Every year it's a big debate among sports fans which teams should play for the college football championship. It's not often you get two undefeated teams. Sometimes you get one; sometimes three; sometimes none; so who plays for the #1 ranking isn't always clear cut. This year there are 2 undefeated teams, and I've been hearing this on the ESPN and other radio sports shows about the USC/Texas Rose Bowl for the college football championship: "You have to give the BCS credit. They got it right this year." So I decided to show my daughter Danielle a list of the top ten college football teams this year along with their record. I asked her, "Out of these 10 teams, which two should play for the championship?" She looked it over and 15 seconds later she pointed out the two undefeated teams, USC and Texas. So for those of you in the sports media, please add, "You have to give the BCS and 10-year-old Danielle McIntee credit. They got it right this year." It doesn't take much sports-genius to decide who deserves the championship bowl bid this year. The BCS doesn't deserve credit for deciding on USC and Texas. Heck, a 10-year-old girl could see that.