Dave started to say something which I was able to finish. Any long time listener would have been able to do the same.
"I'm not the kind of guy who blows his own horn . . . . ."
And Dave finishes it with, " . . . . but I would if I could . . ."
I laugh every time I hear it.

Having the National Turkey Calling Champions on the show inspired him to do a bit of turkey calling on his own. He demonstrates, sounding halfway between a loon and a kookaburra. Dave adds, "Coincidentally, that's also a French horn." Audience laughs at the non-sensical comment, which should trigger your "oh, something from the pre-show Q&A" reaction.

It's Tuesday so we head out over to Rupert's for a visit. It's been cold in New York these past few days. In fact today, it went down to 26 degrees. Imagine that! 26 degrees in February! Dave makes real short talk with Rupert and sends him outside to find a contestant for "Guess What's Frozen." While Rupert is looking for a contestant, Dave has a show to put on.

The Academy Awards are on Sunday. The nominees always get a lovely gift bag and a friend of Dave's, Vince, let him borrow one. The Academy Award gift bag doesn't seem that great this year.
Dave reaches in and pulls out a box of Tic Tacs. I always am disappointed when something like Tic Tacs gets a laugh. It wasn't meant to be funny.
Dave reaches in again and pulls out a surgical mask labeled, 'Bird Flu Mask.'
And finally, last but not least, in the bag is a bottle of Gay Cowboy Massage Oil.

This just in from Vegas: The over/under for "Brokeback Mountain" jokes at the Academy Awards is 10.

GEORGE W. BUSH: OH MY GOD: From a January 26th press conference. The President is standing in front of a podium. He speaks:
Bush - "First, I recognize . . . . . (the Commander in Chief stops and stares into space) . . . . . . we live in a momentous time . . . . ." (he again stares into space.)
My guess is somebody in the audience had a red shiny object.

According to a CBS News poll, President Bush's approval rating has hit a new low. What's remarkable is that they were able to pinpoint the exact moment when his numbers dropped. We see a clip of the President walking across the White House lawn. In the corner of the screen we see a graphic reading: "Approval Rating: 42%." As the President walks across the lawn, he turns and spits. The approval rating graphic suddenly drops down to 34%.
Oh, if it were only the spit that did it.

Did you hear? Bill Clinton is looking to hire 25 interns for his philanthropic foundation. Obviously he has a checkered past with interns, but this looks like a one-of-a-kind opportunity.
Announcer:

"The William J. Clinton Foundation is pleased to announce openings for 25 college interns throughout our organization. This is a unique job opportunity that blows away your standard college job, giving you the chance to travel the world, performing your job wherever the winds of freedom blow and help deliver a blow to tyranny the world over. You may even get to do a job for Bill Clinton himself when he blows into town. Best of all, it comes with an assortment of job benefits that will blow your mind. We don't want to blow our own horn about this job, but for a blow-by-blow job description, blow on over to our website and click on 'jobs.'
Don't let his job blow away, because you could be blowing the job of a lifetime.
Bill Clinton: Creating job opportunities since 1992."

NATIONAL TURKEY CALLING CHAMPIONS - the competition was last weekend in Nashville, Tennessee, put on by the National Wild Turkey Federation. Check out their website at http://www.nwtf.org/
1. Walter Parrot - from Smiths, Alabama. third runner-up, Senior division. Walter's call is the "cutting of excited hen" - or a mating call. As Walter prepares for his call, Dave notices him putting something into his mouth. Dave quickly calls him on it. Walter says it is customary to put something in your mouth to perform a turkey call. You can see Dave sour a bit on the competition now that he knows an artificial device is used to perform the call. The way Walter Parrot slipped that thing into his mouth reminded me of the time I saw Mr. Fuji slip a shiv into his tights during a WWF professional wrestling match at Madison Square Garden 25 years ago. He did it real slick, hoping no one would notice. Dave noticed Walter Parrot doing this. I noticed Mr. Fuji doing it a quarter century ago. Somehow that night, the ref in the ring missed it. Walter Parrot performs his cutting call. The call was a series of fast, loud erratic single notes. It was a modified cluck and is a distinct abrupt call with a somewhat questioning nature. It can be heard at a great distance and is often used by a single turkey looking for companionship. Walter Parrot kept at the turkey call for a longer time than necessary. A pleased Dave says, "I could listen to hat all night . . . and for a while there, I thought I was about to." I laughed, but don't blame Walter. During rehearsal, Walter performed his call for just a few seconds. Our director asked if he could extend the call a bit longer. A turkey call somewhere in between the one Walter did in rehearsal and the one he did during the show would have been perfect.

2. Billy Yargus of Ewing, Missouri. Billy was second runner-up, Senior Division. Billy's been competing for 9 years. When he's not competing, Billy works making wheels for trucks. Billy's call will be an Old Hen Assembly.
The hen assembly call is a series of loud yelps in order to assemble her flock or young poults. Billy, too, slips an object into his mouth for his call. If you closed your eyes while Billy performed his call, you would swear there was an actual turkey in the house. Billy's hat? Woodhaven Custom Calls. Google it and find Billy Yargus.

3. Matthew Van Sice, from Grand Valley, Pennsylvania - the Champion of the Senior Division. Matthew is a forester at a lumber company. Matthew is all serious when it comes to turkey calling; there is no funnin' around with Matthew. What did Matthew win for being crowned champion? He won $5,000 and a championship ring. Matthew is set to perform a Kee Kee Run. The Kee Kee is the lost call of young turkeys and variations made by adult birds. It's often associated with fall hunting, but can be used successfully in the spring.
Matthew's Kee Kee Run sounded a lot like a barking chihuahua.

To close up the Turkey Callers, Dave has the three of them join in together and perform as a trio.

BARBARA WALTERS: Barbara Walters sits in the guest chair and Dave pulls out a bottle of Wild Turkey. She pours Barbara a shot as Dave chugs from the bottle. Not that's the way to greet a guest! Dave has Barbara run down the list of co-hosts on The View. Dave is impressed with how good Star Jones now looks and wants to know how she lost all the weight. And how much did she lose? Dave estimates she once weighed around 600 pounds. Of course she never weighed that much but probably approached half that.
Barbara has met many people in her line of work, one being King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia. Dave holds up a photo of Barbara and the King. She speaks of the changes he is trying to make in Saudi Arabia, a change that needs to come slowly and carefully. Dave takes a closer look at the photo and points something out that I had not seen earlier. In the background in the photo you can see on one of the many monitors . . . . the graphic of the Late Show's "Will It Float." How about that! They really are changing in Saudi Arabia. I would think they would not be very good at "Will It Float" due to the paucity of water in the region.
And Barbara has met the Dalai Lama. In another photo, we see the two rubbing noses. Not good if you have a cold.

Dave and Barbara talk about the possibility of Katie Couric leaving NBC's Today show and coming to CBS to do the Evening News. Barbara thinks a woman being a network anchor is no big deal; it's not even an issue. I agree. I think a woman can read a teleprompter for 10 minutes a night just as well as a man.
Barbara has her 25th annual Academy Awards edition of "The Barbara Walters Special" Wednesday night on ABC. Don't bother looking on the ABC website because you won't find any information there to help you out. (Maybe today, Wednesday, they do.) I went on the site Monday and Tuesday looking for a bit of info I thought Dave could use but they were offering nothing. I don't get it. It's a Special during Sweeps and they make you work hard to find out about it. CBS often suffers the same problem and when I mentioned this to someone, she told me that NBC is the worst. So what's going on here? How many people does a network need to keep their website up to date?

ACT 5: It's time to play Late Show Number Scramble. Can you rearrange these numerals to form a popular five-digit number? (2 7 4 9 1) Can you do it? That's right, it's 79,142! Hope you got it!
This has been the Late Show Number Scramble! Thanks for watching and drive safely."

TYLER JAMES WILLIAMS: He's the Chris in "Everybody Hates Chris" on the UPN, Thursdays at 8:00. This is his first talk show he's been on . . . . in the east . . . and to show his appreciation, Tyler unzips his jacket and shows off the Late Show T-Shirt he is wearing. Tyler is a local, his father a former member of the NYPD. Tyler spent a lot of time hanging out at the Police Academy in his youth (youth?) and remembers the time he was in a squad car with his dad. There was lots of traffic. Tyler asked if he could push the siren button. His dad let him. (According to the NYPD Patrol Guide, Section 8, page 29, you are allowed to let your son play with the police siren while in traffic.) Tyler turned on the siren and soon saw cars moving out of the way to let them drive through. (Is Tyler sure this happened in New York City? That's not the New York City I remember when I turned on the siren.)
Tyler sees Chris Rock a lot on the set, whose life is loosely portrayed in "Everybody Hates Chris." Chris' advice to Tyler when it comes to acting the part is something like, "We hired you because of you, so when acting, be you."
"Everybody Hates Chris" - Thursdays at 8:00 on the UPN.

And that was our show for Tuesday, February 28, 2006. Wahoo EXTRA!

They had a 21-gun salute for Don Knotts at his funeral. Unfortunately, they only had one bullet.

After 11 days, Saddam Hussein has ended his hunger strike. The reason he gave was because he was hungry.

Tuesday's New York Times - For the Record section: corrections.

"An obituary of the actor Don Knotts yesterday and in some copies on Sunday misspelled the name of a character on 'The Andy Griffith Show,' in which he starred. She was Aunt Bee, not Bea."

Former Late Show head writer Rodney Rothman appeared on the CBS Sunday morning show. Here is an article on his visit.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/02/26/sunday/main1346180.shtml

It's time for the Wahoo Gazette's "LATE NIGHT THE DAY THEY WERE BORN"
Tyler James Williams was born October 9, 1992. So what happened on Late Night the day he was born?
Late Night - October 9, 1992
Larry King Live Footage with George Bush showing driver's license;
Viewer Mail:
-Dave's house pamphlet;
-Calvert a peacock;
-Paul and Julie in the audience;
-Bake-Off (vt)
Top Ten: Frequently Recalled Fisher Price Toys
Jay Thomas;
Dave visits Regis and Kathie Lee to swap ties
Blue Rodeo perform "Restless"
Female hockey player, Manon Rheaume

You got 2 songs to play on the jukebox. What are you going to play?
Andrew Hoenig of Rockville, Maryland

Bobby Darin - Mack the Knife
Dave Brubeck - Take Five

"American Woman" by the Guess Who
"In-a-gadda-da-vida" by Iron Butterfly, the long (17 minute) version

"In regards to Jukebox tunes. When I was at the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, there was a bar on Water Street (the student bar scene) called Old Home Tavern & it had a great jukebox. The songs that I remember usually playing: Sitting On The Dock Of The Bay - Ottis Redding
Layla - Eric Clapton
Like A Rolling Stone & Rainy Day Women #13 & 35 - Bob Dylan
And on the first warm day after a long cold winter, you would always hear Summer Breeze - Seals & Croft and Black Dog - Leg Zeppelin blasting from the windows of dorms & student apartments.
Those 6 songs will forever live in my heart and memory of my young adulthood."